A Lesson Before Dying!

Hi fellow Washingtonians. As a car owner I notice many things about what makes a good pedestrian, and what makes a bad pedestrian. And it is amazing to me, AMAZING, how many bad, bad, stupidly bad pedestrians we really have in this city. ESPECIALLY during rush hour!! What the fuck is going on people??? So here is an overview, just in case you forgot, because you couldn't possibly remember this knowledge and still be making these mistakes, I mean you HAD to have forgotten the simple rules of crossing a street right??

Alright, so, this is a crosswalk:




You use this to cross the street! Don't be afraid. It is your friend. Please, please, PLEASE don't cross the street with no crosswalk while cars are speeding down the double yellow lined pavement of death.



NO! BAD! No crosswalk! No walking! And if you want to risk it, don't just slowly walk so that the cars have to slam on their brakes that perhaps could cause an accident. RUN!

If you have made it through this tutorial so far, I'm sure you realize now that you should always use the crosswalks and will use them from now on. Now here are some crosswalk edict tips.

This means STOP, or DON'T WALK




This too. This one is easy. Just read it!



Now this one means GO, or WALK




This too. Again, just read it!




Now when the cars have a green light on the street that you are about to cross, that does NOT mean you can cross. Because you will be hit. Now you might think, well duh that is common sense. But I cannot tell you how many times I have seen this happen.


Well that is all for this lesson. I hope you have all learned something. So next time if you cross the middle of the street with no crosswalk or walk/don't walk signs in sight in the middle of rush hour and you are going at a snails pace and I hit you, it's not my fault. You've been warned.

Hurry!

Guys! You need to get to North Capital Street right now! As I was driving to work, I drove past a man selling things on the side of the road. I've seen the usual, water, CD's, flowers, etc. But today was the combination to end all combinations. A man was on the side of North Capital Street selling socks and porn!! Yes!! Socks and porn, folks! Ewww!! Naked ladies on the DVD boxes and everything! Stay classy, side-of-the-road salesman. Stay classy.

Seriously?? Seriously!!

Something I read on IMDB. Ridic. Boo hoo. Welcome to our world.




Starring in hit Broadway play Cat On A Hot Tin Roof has left actor Terrence Howard depressed and swearing he'll never return to the stage.

The Iron Man insists that if he had known the theatre schedule was so tough he would never have signed up for the role in the beloved Tennessee Williams play.

He claims that appearing on stage at New York's Broadhurst Theatre every night and trying to cram his personal life and business meetings into one day off have left him exhausted.

And he has turned to allergy medicine just to stay healthy.

He says, "Tough thing about Broadway is (it's) eight shows a week. It's slavery. That needs to be adjusted. It's wrong.

"Actors work three years straight sometimes with one day off. This exhaustion puts you into depression.

"Monday, your one day off, you have to cram in all your meetings and appointments and the rest of your whole life, and hope you can survive on Benadryl.

"Broadway is an actor's revenge. I couldn't do Broadway again if it's more than five (shows) a week. I'd just say no... Not doing it."

Ooo de la lee

Did you know that the Disney Channel occasionally plays old Disney movies in the middle of the afternoon?? No, I don't watch the Disney Channel regularly. Except for Hannah Montana, that is totes my favorite show. (that's on the Disney Channel, right?)

Anyway, what showed up on my guide the other day? The cartoon version of Robin Hood! My favorite Disney cartoon. And that fox Robin Hood was kind of hot for a cartoon...and a fox.

But the best part by far is Prince John. Actually, the actor who voiced Prince John, Peter Ustinov. Thank you IMDB. His performance is brilliant. I find myself laughing out loud to this day. I found a "best of" montage on YouTube and I thought I would share it. If you haven't seen this movie, 1) where have you been?? and 2) go rent it or keep the Disney Channel on. It is bound to be re-aired. I've seen it about 3 times already!





Power...POWER!!

Goodbye Blue Sky

Crumble closed on Saturday. Very sad panda. An experience like Crumble is rare. Usually, when the time comes, you are ready to say goodbye to a show and move on. I did not want to say goodbye to this show. I was actually teary during the curtain call. I'm in love with this play, I truly am.

Last winter was when I was introduced to this script. I had just closed We Are Not These Hands, which was also written by Sheila Callaghan. My friend CW came to see it and asked if I had read Crumble. I said no and he said he was going to send it to me immediately because there was a part that I HAD to play. He was in the Actors Theatre of Louisville apprentice program and that place has a room with hundreds and hundreds of plays so he got to read a lot of really cool shit. One of which was Crumble.

So he sent it in the mail and I began reading immediately. And immediately I was hooked. I loved it. I laughed out loud. I cried a few times. By the end, big, fat tears were streaming down my face. Not only because of my deep love and admiration for the script, but also because I wanted to do it SO BADLY!! It's not often that I have such a need to do a part. Usually if I ever get that feeling, I end up not getting the part because I get too nervous and too high strung about it. So I was trying to breath and tell myself that if it was meant to be, a theater in DC will do it and I will have an opportunity to audition. Well, a few weeks later, Catalyst announces their season. And in the third slot, Crumble. AHHHHHH!!! I immediately start emailing to see when auditions will be. Which got a "calm down" and "breath" and "don't worry you will be seen" response from SF. The waiting! The re-reading! I had a lot of time on my hands, I didn't have anything long term lined up until the summer, ok?? Stop judging.

Anyway, long story short, I was offered the part. Then I found out who else was in it and I was ecstatic. I couldn't have asked for a better cast who all fit their roles perfectly. Rehearsals were relaxing and challenging (in a good way). We had an amazing time. And I found so much in common with this character, this very disturbed little girl. Apart from witnessing her father die in a tragic and bizarre accident, and having no communication/relationship with her mother, and the whole building a bomb thing, I did have a lot in common with Miss Janice. We are only children, we did voices for our stuffed animals and dolls (although I hated dolls, but stuffed animals, very correct), we have a single parent, we got lonely at times, we talk to ourselves, we daydream, we had teen idol crushes (hers was JT, mine was Joey McIntyre. duh.), we fought with our mothers, we felt like people didn't understand us, we were outcasts at school, some popular girls were very mean to us, we were hyper.

I will miss her.

And I will miss my Crumble people. So many thanks and love to the Apartment (Gou!), JS, for continuing to be a great and committed scene partner (even though I didn't even get to look at him). JT/Dad/Harrison, EM, one of my best friends who had me cracking up throughout the show and who I can ALWAYS count on. Mom, ER, for being supportive and lovely and funnier than she thinks! Crazy Aunt Barbara, KA, for being everyone's cheerleader, for being witty and understanding and wise and silly. To Sheila for writing a beautiful, crazy, bizarre, moving, hilarious, intense, tragic, hopeful script. To our kick ass stage manager CC and assistant stage manager KJ for having a shit ton of props to set, and lots and lots of sound cues, and who always seemed to be on top of it all and one step ahead of everyone else. To our designers who, let's face it, were in-fucking-credible. I didn't know how the show was going to work design wise when I read it. And they ended up creating this amazing world. And finally, to our fearless leader, City Mouse, who is a truly gifted director and an incredible person who I love to work with and always seems to pull out the best stuff from me and the actors around her.

And, of course, thank you to everyone who saw it. We were either sold out or almost sold out every night. Thank you all for your support.

Some people shouldn't be teachers

This article infurates me to no end. What is WRONG with people?? Why do people like this become teachers? I had this teacher in the 4th grade who was evil. I have always been terrible at math so I had a lot of questions. Every other teacher I have ever had had always been patient and understanding and offering to help me whenever I needed the extra time. But this woman, whenever I had a question, she would throw her hands up in the air, or make some comment, actually implied once that I probably have a learning disability. Once we were reading in a circle and I was a little shy, I did NOT like to read in front of people. I still have a fear of speaking in front of people. As myself, as someone else I'm totally fine, of course. So, I was nervous and uneasy so I was stuttering a bit. She asked me if I could even read and then asked if I had a stutter. In front of the entire class. Evil, spawn of satan, evil evil! She gave me such a complex. My mother pulled me out of that school. She was so angry. So I can only IMAGINE how this mother feels! I'm not comparing what I went through with what this poor child went through. What he went through is inhumane and cruel. My point is that I don't understand why there are teachers like this. You go into that profession because you want to make a difference, you love children, you believe in our future, you want to contribute. Well, those SHOULD be the reasons. But I start to question what these teachers' reasons are for going into the profession because they do not express any of these qualities and wants. This woman should be fired and never ever allowed to teach anywhere ever again.

Kindergarten Show Trial


Sorry for the angry post. I needed to vent.

Wow

Ok, so, yeah. I'm a bad blogger. Bad, bad blogger. I should be punished. I should be banished to blog purgatory. I just started this and I'm not doing so well. I have that problem. I start projects and I seldom finish or stick with them. That has got to change. Seriously. Just a hideous and lazy habit of mine. So, here is a giant panda update!

I got my car back. After a month of waiting. A month of a boxy, boring, hard-to see-over-the-dashboard rental. A month of talking to my insurance company, a body shop, and a Toyota dealership. Two weeks after my car was recovered, I took a cab out in the middle of nowhere DCalmostMD to a body shop where they were replacing my smashed window. They say it's finished. It's not. The glass is but it's disgusting dirty flithy and all of the lights are on in the interior. Check engine, four wheel drive, low fuel, every light. So they have to tow it to a Toyota dealership. Then the car was misplaced. No one knew where it was. Then we realized that it was under a different name. Cesar. My name is not Cesar. This took all day to figure out. They determined that whoever stole my car must have been drag racing because all of the meters and insert technical mumbo jumbo were off so they had to be reset and that's a sign of either drag racing or severe offroading. Then it was towed back to the body shop so they can clean it. Finally finally I have my car back. I have to talk him down on occasion, he is still very fragile. But he is starting to feel like himself again. And I was assigned a DA and I have all of my receipts for costs I had to cover myself so hopefully I am going to get some money from the jackass that took my car.

I opened a show! Come see it! I'm really really proud of this show. I read this script before Catalyst even announced they were doing it and I was obsessed. Then I became even more obsessed once they announced their season. Thankfully, I'm apart of this amazing team of actors, designers, crew, and kick ass director, City Mouse. We have received wonderful responses from audience members and critics! Here are the reviews:

The Washington Post

DC Theatre Scene

Potomac Stages

Metro Weekly

We have two weeks left of performances and tickets are going fast. There are only 49 seats so if you are thinking about coming, reserve your tickets now! Justin Timberlake and Harrison Ford will be there!

I went to DFGs' sister's wedding shower. I drank A LOT of wine with his sisters. It was a good time.

My mom and uncle came up to see the show. They love love loved it! We ate a lot of really good food and did some shopping (of course). My uncle also got to meet DFG. He most definitely passed the test. My uncle adored him. He already passed my mother's inspection, which is a BIG deal if any of you know my mother. When she first met him, I didn't get the dreaded "He's nice" comment. That usually means there is a "but" after it which she is withholding. But no. She outright said she really liked him. And that he was cute. Holla. We also went to see DFG's show. I had already seen it but my mom and uncle wanted to see him act. They really enjoyed the show, had a great time, and thought he was very good. Speaking of the show, please go see it! This is the final week!

I almost lost my voice. I always almost lose my voice when working on or doing a show. The first time was during rehearsals for Twelfth Night at Catholic University. I was a grad student performing the lead with a professional director at the helm. I so wanted to impress him and do my best, but for that first week of table work I could barely speak. I was squeaking out Shakespeare pitifully until the director finally asked me, "Are you EVER going to get better??" "I don't know!!" I cried out, all dramatic like. I did, obviously. Second time was during performaces of Junie B. Jones at Imagination Stage. A musical no less. I had to sing about 10 very high energy numbers and I had no range at this point. For 3 day time performances, Junie B. sounded like a 70 year old smoker. Sexy. Thankfully, I had a mic so I didn't have to push my voice. Now this past weekend of shows was the most recent attack. The sinus infection I had for about 3 weeks decided to hide, then reveal itself in my chest last Wednesday before shows picked back up on Thursday. And in this show, I do a few different voices. They all kind of sounded the same this weekend. To me anyway. People said they didn't even really notice. Bless their sweet little hearts. I heart all of you.

I believe I am caught up. Now I will do my very best to keep this more up to date. I can't do any worse than I already have, right??

You Got It (The Right Stuff)

Ok people. Settle down. Here it is. The big announcement.

NKOTB is back!

They're not really new. Nor are they kids. But no matter. They are actually back together.

I was obsessed with them. OBSESSED. I first loved Jordan. But then the rat tail was really getting to me so I switched to Joey. Joey was my man. I swear I would sit there and take his age and subtract my age and think to myself, "Well, when I'm 20, he will be 28. That's not bad!" This was when I was 9 and thought that 20 was a perfect age for me to meet the love of my life and get married. ha ha indeed. May work for some people, and props to them truly, but not for me.

And merchandise? I had everything New Kids. The dolls (casual wear and concert wear complete with stage!), sleeping bag, pillows, trading cards, fake autographed glossys, key chain, buttons, oh my. My friends and I would bring in our newest New Kid item and oooh and ahhh over it. I remember Julie's favorite was Jon, Gina's was Donny, Michelle's was Jordan. She became upset when I abandoned Team Jordan for Team Joey but I believe she too eventually saw the error of her ways and joined with me.

They were also my first concert. And second. Yes, I saw them twice! Age 8 and age 9. My poor sweater bound uncle held me on his shoulders the whole concert while I was swaying to the music, screaming, and acting embarrassingly ridiculous. He was sweating buckets and he had back and shoulder pain for days that he didn't tell me about until I was much older and he could give me a hard time about it. At that concert, he was the age I am now. He had to take on the "father role" at 21 when my parents split up and he didn't have to do that. He saw countless dance recitals, choir concerts, plays. He even dressed up as Big Bird for my 2nd birthday in the middle of a heat wave in November. And of course, went through the hell of seeing New Kids surrounded by thousands of screaming pre-adolescents with me on his shoulders...twice. He deserves a medal. A giant medal adorned with jewels and gold. Something very tacky and loud that gets my statement of love and admiration across correctly.

So anyway, back to NKOTB, at the age of 9 1/2, I was over them. Basically, it wasn't popular to like them anymore so they were dropped.

Then I went through a long phase of listening to movie soundtracks.

Cat Power!

When I was a kid, I loved the Garfield comic. I would look through any newspaper lying around in order to read the strip. Every year I would get a Garfield desk calendar, even though I didn't have a desk, just so I could have a new strip everyday.

Recently, I came across a website that publishes a Garfield comic everyday....but with Garfield removed! How?? you may ask. How is this possible?? How will it make sense?? The comic strip is called Garfield! What followed was one of the longest laughs I have ever experienced. Take Garfield away, and you have one crazy ass, manic depressive Jon. Here are some examples:

Click here for the site.




Enjoy.

No Cars Go

So much to write about! Last week was a pretty intense week. What with temping, planning a closing night party, trying to go to spring training for my softball team, and my car getting stolen. Oh that's right. My car got stolen!! From my locked garage at my apartment! Here's the recap:

I get home last Tuesday from spring training around 8. Then D and I load up my car with a few things to take to his parents house, including his drum set and three bins full of electronics. Since we were both off the next day, we thought we would go ahead and take care of it so we could sleep in and drive up in the afternoon. So we do just that. We sleep in. We take our time getting ready. Leisurely walk down to the garage to find that there is no car in my spot. The first thing that ran through my head was, "Ok, which one of us had the car last and where did we park it?" because I have done that before. Then I noticed the trail of glass on the right side of the parking space.

We run upstairs, cursing and panicking the whole way. We get inside the apartment and I immediately call the police. They show up over 2 hours later. Ugg. During that time, I'm on the phone with my insurance company almost constantly while getting the occasional call from a member of my family. My mom quietly freaking out, my uncle staying cool. Our family friend who has worked at my family's business since I was born getting on the phone and telling me that I should have a drink.

After the cop leaves, my insurance company arranges for me to have a rental car. I get in a cab to go to the rental car company and, as I'm en route, my phone rings. It is a DC detective asking if I knew I had low jack on my car. For those of you who don't know, low jack is like a GPS device. In other words, they were tracking my car! Very high tech, James Bond shit going on. And an hour later, they call me back telling me they recovered my car and made an arrest. Then they asked me if the drum set belonged to me. D about jumped out of his skin he was so excited. So while he was doing his show, I went down to the precinct to retrieve all of my belongings from the car. This included D's drum set, two of his bins, and my CD's. The only thing missing was my iPod and one of D's bins that had a GameCube in it. There were also some additions to my car. Stolen merchandise. Several XXX-Large t-shirts with loud print on the front, a carry-on bag, and a Dora the Explorer hat. Score!

As of now, I'm still in the rental car. The guy will go to trial and I will have to go to give my statement, which I am very much looking forward to just to see this guy. They did an estimate of the damage, which was just the window. Now my insurance company gets it repaired and I can have my car, Maximus, back very soon. I miss him.

The moral of the story: it apparently doesn't matter if your car is in a locked garage. And low jack is awesome. Get it if you can. Or maybe The Club. The Club is not a bad idea.

Videotape

Good news on a couple of shorts I was in.

The first being "The Kumbio Takedown" with my buddies at Intergral Arts, Barry Gribble and Kevin Good. We shot this short last spring for the 48 hour film festival in DC. It ended up winning Best of DC, Best Acting, Best Screenplay, and the Audience Award. It also starred the very cool Missy Doty who was in "Sideways". Well I just found out that "Kumbio" is going to be shown at Cannes! Like the film festival Cannes! We aren't competing in the festival, but our film and about 10 others will be shown twice during the festival as apart of a 48 hour film presentation. You can watch the film here:

The Kumbio Takedown

I'm in it at the very end. DFG is in it too getting his ass kicked in jail.


The other film is "Lizzie Strata". I did this with the boys of Integral Arts too in January. "Lizzie" is a 40's period musical comedy road movie based on the Greek classic of a similar name. Basically it was me sitting in a 40's Cadillac for a few hours with some really cool chicks. Hard job, I know. The boys had been selected by a panel of judges to be one of five teams competing in the Panasonic HD Showdown. Which meant that Panasonic sent them this amazing, high tech camera is use to make a brand new 48 hour film, being "Lizzie Strata". The film took first place in the showdown, winning the boys a Panasonic HVX200 camera. I don't know what that means, but it sounds expensive and high tech and awesomefantastic. And it showed on the big screen at the festival, which kicks ass. You can watch "Lizzie" here:

Lizzie Strata


Good times!

Welcome mat

I have created a blog. I'm not really new to this. I used to blog on myspace but, since I have been eaten up by facebook, I am not on myspace as much as I used to be. But I still had the urge to blog. Mostly because I'm temping and get bored very easily. I don't know if I will offer much profound, life altering posts. But I do come across the occasional fantastic youtube video or article. I do rant. There will be ranting. I get annoyed. Mostly about stupid things that don't matter. So I purge them so I can worry about real things that actually matter.

Now about the blog name.

Southern.

I am. I'm proud of it. I'm proud of my family, who are all still living in the south. It has become a place to visit for me, not so much a home. But it is apart of me, and always will be.

Bellicose.

- adj. Warlike or hostile in manner or temperament.

Ok, so, I'm not really like this. I am fiesty, opinionated, and passionate. But I'm not looking for a fight. I don't like confrontation. This is mostly a play on words. Southern Belle. You get it. My good friend, Barry, came up with the title of this blog. So all the credit must go to him. What do you expect? He is a writer. Clever bastard.

Anyway, welcome. Thanks for reading. Be seeing you soon.